Baby Buzz: Could a New Arrival Be Around the Corner?

Dear Diary,

Holy $!#&!!! I know I should have waited and that I was very close to hurting my own feelings again, but I just couldn’t help myself! At 11DPO, I was alone and vulnerable to the thoughts racing through my mind. My husband was out all day and I was bored and over-emotional. My Tiktok feed was just one pregnancy announcement after another. I couldn’t help it, so I caved and took another test. And guess what… I could’ve sworn I saw the faintest, tiniest positive line.

Cue ChatGPT and overanalyzing that strip for the next three hours. My palms were sweaty and my heart was pounding. This could be it! This could be the miracle I’d been praying for. I quickly assembled some cardstock, an old cardboard box and some markers. Just in case, I thought to myself. Just in case this is really happening. I wanted to tell my husband in a cute, personal and heart warming way. I made a little card for him (“Only the best husbands get promoted to Daddy” - how stinking cute?!). Then I made a quick purchase of two tickets to

the Toronto Baby Show happening in the Spring and printed out the ticket, also placing it in the box. I knew there was more I wanted to do, but I told myself I would wait until a firm positive test to give him this box.

The next morning, I felt deflated. The test I took didn’t seem to be much darker. I was so scared. What if I jumped the gun? Did I jinx myself? Was I just seeing things? Was it just an evaporation line? I shoved the box under the bed, disappointed. It was Family Day. I thought I was getting a do-over…

But then in the morning of 13DPO, the test strip was ever so slightly darker. And what are the odds that three days in a row there was a faint line? So after work, I drove over to the mall and picked up a pair of tiny baby booties. My husband and I had always said we wanted to get our baby some white Nike slip ons to match with our own shoes. I found the perfect pair and picked up some more pregnancy tests as well (the fancy ones). I got home, packed the box up and knew I just had to wait one more day before I could share this beautiful secret. 14DPO, I woke up to a snow day from work. My husband also didn’t go to work that

morning. It was so perfect ! As we were getting ready to go to the gym together, I quickly set up my phone to record his reaction. I placed the box on the dining table and casually said ‘Oh by the way a package came for you. It’s on the table.’

My husband, absolutely clueless, went over to it and opened it. He stared at it for a second, not fully understanding. Then he read the card cover again and looked over at me, incredulous. I couldn’t stop the tears, nodding my head and finally being able to tell him all about the last 3 days. I booked our first doctor's appointment, we talked about ideas for telling our families and I let myself hope that this was happening.I’m still so scared. That this is all too good to be true. I’m waiting anxiously for my doctor's appointment, a whole week away, and trying not to Google every symptom I’m experiencing.

Fingers crossed for a healthy blood test and first scan!

See you next week,

B.