Now, when I literally say changed, I don’t mean from head to toe.
But Billie Eilish is one of the most influential people in my life.
It sounds really overdramatic when I say that.
Funny story, once I went to a Billie Eilish concert with my Dad and he sat there and he had no idea really much about Billie Eilish because my mum was supposed to go with me, but he said at the end of the performance when we got in the car and he was like do you know what I understand why you are the way you are.
I’ve no idea where that came from and I didn’t ask him either which was very odd for me because I'm the sort of person to ask questions all the time hence why I wanna be a journalist.
But I sat then I was like yeah exactly.
I don’t know how I could’ve answered that question or what led to that question or that statement for me.
I’ve been a Billie Eilish fan since when she came out on SoundCloud and I used to watch YouTube videos with my Grandad.
Her interviews, her music videos everything up until really 2019 and he loved watching her.
He didn’t really care as to who she was, but he just loved watching it with me because she was so fun and as a teenager growing up, listening to what she had to say in interviews, especially in vogue ones.
These are some very special memories to me.
If you haven’t watched them you definitely need to watch them.
She said all the things that I was thinking in my head for such a long time and she articulated a lot of thoughts in my life and situations, especially with anxiety and depression.
She spoke about them in a way that almost gave me hope and almost made me feel more confident.
Her songs obviously with songs that are relatable growing up as women.
After every single album she has depicted love, heartbreak, insecurities and feminism in a way that I could never even articulate that well and I love writing.
I love writing and seeing different views on things and grounding things more instead of just thinking about things exactly how it is.
That is incredible because everyone wants to feel like they’re related to.
Not feeling related can be quite lonely and having someone exactly the same as you making music about very similar situations, just makes you feel very grounded.
You may be different within your lifestyles but to me but we all follow and feel the same things.
I think that's why Billie changed me because my outlook on life from someone who is the same age as me changed and it opened the door to thinking.
That I am not this alien and I feel the same things as other people do and there are other people out there and it’s not just me.
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