I always wonder if I’d been told this sooner, if I would’ve treated people differently.
As a person who is very emotional, loving and nurturing once those walls come down I am very much black-and-white.
I will do anything for that person and sometimes the more you give the more the person takes which ends up difficult.
If they take too much they aren’t treating you right and treating you how you should do and not seeing your worth as much as they did in the beginning.
It is difficult to detach but you have to remember that you shouldn’t have to have the same conversation twice.
You should never have to tell someone what they should be doing, how they should be speaking to you and how they feel about you.
You should not have to tell them more than once, they should know.
They should know right in front of them exactly what they are dealing with and what they’ve got.
If they don’t see that they don’t see your worth and that doesn’t dignify your worth at all.
You have to let go of that person because if they don’t know how to treat you first of all that’s showing signs that they don’t know how to treat themselves because they don’t have the self-love and self-worth within themselves.
They’re going to treat themselves how they treat you.
For example, something that my friend mentioned recently which really opened my eyes up is that hypothetically how we spend our day is how we attract.
So if you’re the sort of person that goes and sleeps with people, you are going to expect that other people to sleep with people because that is something all you know.
Whereas if you are someone who is quite busy in life, you will end up finding someone that is very similar within that dating scheme.
How you view yourself is how you view other people and expect to be because you don’t know any different.
Some people are a bit blasé to how they treat people so sometimes they don’t realise the things you need and are a priority to you.
For example, if you expected to talk to someone 24/7 all the time to feel like you are close to them, long-distance but the other person doesn’t see that as a priority and are happy to speak to you throughout the day every so often and see each other spend quality time.
There are two different balances weighing together which can be really difficult because it’s not that they don’t have any true good intentions, it’s that they view relationships very differently.
I think as well with the whole concept of not teaching people how to treat you, you shouldn’t have to ask someone to do the smallest things like effort.
To ask you how you are, to be interested in what you are interested in.
If people don’t give you their time they don’t see you as a priority as something that they want to spend their time with.
That has nothing to do with you, that is up to them.
They may have their reasons as to why they don’t want to see you as much but that is to be vocalised between two of you which is communication.
If they’re not showing that communication they aren’t treating you how they should be.
By having to sit someone down and tell them that they should do this is the biggest red flag because you shouldn’t have to ask them to do something that they should already know, they should already do those things especially at the start.
They did it and they’ve changed and they don’t do it as much anymore.
That is such an underrated feeling, which is so hard to get over because you have that expectation of them and they can’t fulfill the expectation.
You aren’t put on this earth to teach someone how to love you or to teach someone how to be your friend.
You’re supposed to teach them about the amazing things in your world, the things that you are interested in, the time, the love, your history, not how they should treat you.
If you have to tell someone twice, don't bother saying it at all.
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